The Rap Sheet - 3CW 7/16/2K6
The Rap Sheet - from the Mad Conservative
Capitol City Championship Wrestling
7/16/2K6 Southern View, IL

Oh boy, all you other wrestling feds better get outta the way cause we're drawing half as much as you are!

Well I haven't written a full blown review of a 3CW event in a very long time. About October of last year after going into exile from NMW I had sought out a place to hone my play by play skills cause I was backstabbed and trashed by my successors in the booth, those being Dane MacLeod and Michael Raines. I needed to go somewhere in front of a completely neutral audience to demonstrate that I could still do the play by play work and was good at it. Since everyone who leaves NMW ends up going to 3CW at some time or another just because it seems to be the most effective way to send a message to whomever was "being a jerk" and hope it brings about some sort of change for the better over there, I became the next in a long line of people to do so. It ended up being that I got shots to do my craft elsewhere at UVW, PWA, NGW and GAW once I got heard by the right people. I guess the well is too poisoned that I can't do back to where I wanted to go. My relationship with 3CW is damaged because they got themselves a radio show that's streamed only on the Internet and certain people apparently don't know how to be responsible with their new priviledges. So after some things were said about me that amounted to a complete and total punkout I decided it was time to walk. Whether I go back depends on people changing their ways, but I don't foresee that happening. June ended up being the last show I did for 3CW for now. Still did UVW at the end of the week, holding back on going on a tirade against the person who punked me out, and witnessing that same person involved in an angle carried across three different feds and Myspace, which becomes important when I get to the main event here. As for me, I finally made my debut for GAW the previous night in some of the worst indoor heat conditions ever.

Live from the Little Flower School in Southern View, IL which is one of Springfield's suburbs. Your ring announcer and commentator is Ryan Christian. I'm sitting in the crowd with Danger Doug Fraze, doing my best to answer questions on who's who since this is apparently his first time here. More new faces show up and I have no idea who they are. 3CW has bought UVW's ring, and thus UVW is no more as they aren't gonna go very long renting a ring every show when they aren't drawing more than 50 people. Course, 3CW only drew 55-60 by my head count, they claim 75, but it's still below 100, which is an important benchmark to reach for success, and they haven't been able to hit that mark for a very long time.

Coming out first, Conner Riley, Jhon Boi McCoy and Chuck Ray--who is some tall bearded guy. Conner complains that he's not here to carry someone on his back and claims McCoy is always taking the fall so he and Chuck attack him. McCoy clotheslines them both down however and goes after Conner, but Chuck clobbers him. This brings out Chip Conway to attempt making the save, Christopher Rain runs out to beat up Conway, but this also brings out Orion and Seth Gruesome, the big men dominate the smaller guys...McCoy and Rain walk off, Conway gets a chair and whacks everyone with it! But Orion and Gruesome pound Conway down, McCoy tries to help Conway but gets double chokeslammed! Big brawl with the sides unclear.

Nemesis, Max Power, Jessie Clark, Sly and Nikki Rose all come out where Donovan Taylor rants and raves about the AWF and why Jessie Clark joined up with them. First he says Sly was robbed by Rip Mystic, then Nikki Rose is supposedly the only woman here. Jessie says Petey was dead weight to him. He wants to be known by a cool name, Jessie the Destroyer...LAME. He's really known as the "Ragin' Redneck". The opponent comes out, he introduces him as "who cares".

"Ragin' Redneck" Jessie Clark vs. El Mechanico - Jessie pounds him down, shoulderblock, choke, suplex, shoulderblock, DDT gets two. Wheelbarrow attempt is blocked, LOW BLOW Jessie, impaler DDT and that's all! Total squash.

WINNER: Jessie Clark pin -> 2:40 mins. ½*

The AWF proceed to beat down El Mech, but Petey Clark runs out to break it up. But there's too many people to fight and he's subdued, so Jokaz and Hachet back together as the Extreme Juggalos run out with chairs to clear the ring.

Kaval vs. Dredd Walker - Well Dredd has now wrestled more times this year than the previous two combined. Kaval with a flying headscissors, drop kick and Dredd takes a break. Dredd with a waistlock, Kaval headscissors, Dredd with a takedown, Kaval tries working on the arm, but Dredd with a drop toe hold and headlock. Kaval escapes a suplex attempt, shining wizard gets two. Kaval flying headscissors, flying clothesline, legdrop gets two. Kaval with kneedrops for two. Kaval tries a moonsault, it's caught, and Dredd dumps him. Kaval hits a knee strike however, blockbuster gets two. Slugfest, Kaval lands on his feet from a back body drop, Dredd with an enzuigiri and locks in the dragon sleeper, scoring the KO. Decent match.

WINNER: Dredd Walker KO -> 8:50 mins. **¾

Drake runs out to attack Dredd, shoves Shawn Gotti down, and they fight to the back.

3CW Tag Team Championship
Visual Violence - Nemesis & Sly vs. Extreme Juggalos - Jokaz & Hachet - Nemesis & Max Power are the actual tag champs, but once again the AWF has another member defend a belt by proxy, and Sly has to have set a record for most title defenses for someone who's not champion. Sly is however, the FTW No Limits champ. The on again off again relationship between Jokaz and Hachet appears on again. Donovan Taylor once again makes the same old tired homo jokes at me. Okay, note to all of you people who have convinced yourselves that I must be "gay"...I declare myself to be a MALE LESBIAN. If you don't know what that means, then you TRULY ARE GAY. Nemesis and Hachet start. Hachet with a full-nelson, takedown, face slam and Nemesis flees. Tag Sly, tag Jokaz. Sly works the arm and pounds away, stepover headscissors, Jokaz trips him up but misses a legdrop. Sly attempt at a springboard clothesline misses. Jokaz with a springboard crossbody gets two. Sly Russian leg sweep, standing hair pull. Tag Nemesis, slams Sly onto Jokaz, then assists with a backflip splash. Nemesis with a headlock, Sly with a dropkick gets two. Jokaz is pounded in the corner as Max Power comes over with a pitcher full of water...as it is HOT in here, though there's some bit of AC running, but the inept security opens the side doors thinking it's cooler outside...when it is much hotter. Arrgh. Sly with a spinning sideslam, choke, but misses the split legged moonsault. Hachet is tagged, Nemesis in, splash misses. Kick to the gut, gut wrench suplex, Hachet is dumped, Jokaz is attacked by Sly, brawl ensues, Jokaz with a Juvy Driver. Nemesis with a DDT on the floor, Hachet is down. Jokaz misses a move on Sly, Nemesis and Sly with a wheelbarrow neckbreaker double team and that gets the pin.

WINNERS: Nemesis & Sly pin -> 8:30 mins. **½

JC Michaels and Kenny O'Brien come out, and they say they're mad at Mickey McNelson because he's betrayed the Irish cause.

Lumberjack Match
Mickey McNelson vs. Kenny O'Brien - Well you can call this a fight at an Irish Pub, there is one across the street and both these guys are doing the Irish gimmick. Kenny works the arm, clothesline. Shoulderblock Mick, they slug it out and Kenny bails into hostile forces and gets pounded down. Back in, they brawl some more, Mick whacks and elbows him down for two. Kenny gets dumped, ALL the lumberjacks get into a brawl, Kenny gets a knee strike, legdrop gets two. Suplex gets two, Kenny dumps Mick out and gets a beatdown for a two count. Kenny with a DDT, crossarm breaker, Mick yanks and kicks the arm, Kenny gets him into a suplex, locks in a sleeper...but lets it go after two. Kenny acts like he won, Mick rolls him up and gets the pin. And everyone continues brawling on the floor.

WINNER: Mickey McNelson pin -> 7:55 mins. *¾

Five-Way Scramble
Black Angel vs. Billy Reno vs. Mike Ushman vs. Kandi Deluxe vs. JC Michaels - JC decides he doesn't want to start the match, he'll just do play by play instead. Kandi originally broke away from 3CW to form UVW, but that appears to be over with. Angel and Kandi go after Ushman and Reno. Reno clotheslines Kandi, Ushman goes after Kandi, Reno and Angel fight. Ushman gets posted by Kandi. Angel kneedrop on Reno, leg yank gets two, goes to a leglock. Ushman and Kandi back in, Angel slams Reno on the ropes for two. Ushman stomps Kandi, Reno side knee on Angel, Kandi kicks Reno, JC thinks about getting in, Kandi whips Reno and side slam for two. JC takes his shirt off, Angel sliding dropkick on Ushman for two. Angel and Ushman on the floor fighting, Kandi crossarm breaker on Reno, JC takes his time, Angel rams Ushman into the post! Ushman is dropped into the front row! Deluxe pounds Reno in the corner, JC goes after Angel. Reno on the second rope with a clothesline on Kandi for two. Ushman gets a chain, JC neck snaps Reno off the ropes, pile up on the floor, JC side elbow on Reno gets two. All five men back in the ring, double boot on Reno, Angel clotheslines JC and flies over the top! Hardy Boyz side kick on Kandi, dropkick by Ushman, cover gets two. JC slams Ushman, swinging jawbreaker! Reno kneedrop on JC, Ushman gets covered for two. Ushman and Kandi in front of us, Angel tries to dive on JC but Kenny O'Brien intercepts, so Angel throws Kenny into the wall! Reno pounds someone on the floor and tosses him into the post. Ushman pounds on Kandi, Ushman gets tossed into the post...and the ref decides he's seen enough and stops the match. WHAT? LAME. Let them brawl until someone gets a pin!

NO WINNER: NO CONTEST -> 8 mins. **

SPWO Heavyweight Championship - Hardcore Match
(c)Nightmare vs. Ed Kowalski - Okay, this SPWO group apparently wants to be thought of as an actual indy fed now instead of an underground group. Well I hope they've gotten a ring bigger than that twelve foot wide one they've got now, otherwise the Chicago crowd will chant "yarder fed" at them. Well they'll do it anyway, simply because they weren't trained specificially by either Eric Priest, Rockin' Randy or Danny Daniels. Whether they get coverage at the STLWC is up to them, considering they didn't want me covering them before due to this underground status of theirs. Nightmare is some masked guy, never seen him before. Drop toe hold Ed, leglock, and Nightmare gets the rope. Nightmare proceeds to work the arm, Ed reverses it and dumps him out, then goes to fetch weapons. Ed kicks the leg, chairs it, rams him into the post and slams the knee on the apron. They flip back into the ring, Nightmare comes up with a chair and blasts Ed with it. 'Mare with a DDT on the chair gets two. 'Mare with a suplex, gets a chair and pounds Ed on the chair, but misses a charge. 'Mare throws it at him, legdrop, DDT, throws another chair on Ed, second rope chairdrop gets two. 'Mare gets the kendo, swings...but hits the ref. Ed grabs him with the death valley driver and that gets the pin as another ref runs out to count the fall.

WINNER: Ed Kowalski pin -> 8:35 mins. **½

Oh but wait, the SPWO ref gets up and throws a retarded temper tantrum, grabs the belt and screams no contest, even though it was no-DQ, claiming only HE was to count the fall, incapaciated or not. Ummm...if you're gonna have your belt defended on someone else's show you assume all the risks that goes with it, otherwise you don't do it.

Jaxson Pride vs. Petey Clark - Well here's a standard GAW match. Pride works the arm, Pete with a boot takedown. Pride with a headlock, Pete trips him for one. They switch around, Pride with a legsweep gets two. Pride with an atomic drop, DDT gets two. Reverse spinning neckbreaker, springboard elbow gets two. They trade chops and slug it out, Pete with a DDT for two, springboard moonsault gets two. Pride dumps Pete out, Pride with an apron spinning neckbreaker! Yeek. Pride with a springboard moonsault for two. Pride with the MUSCLE BUSTER...but it only gets two. Pete with a spinning heel kick, goes to the top, frog splash gets two. Pete with a hard sunset slip gets the pin.

WINNER: Petey Clark pin -> 8:15 mins. ***¼

And of course this match was better than all the other matches thus far. The other members of the Clark family, Jessie and Sly charge the ring to attack Petey and Pride, but they fight them off hitting the Muscle Buster & Styles Clash and send them running. Pride and Petey shake hands in the ring.

Rip Mystic comes out to rant and yell a lot. Rip says he's the NMW Quadruple champion. Errrr...there's only THREE different titles in NMW, what's the FOURTH? Maybe it's the AHMT trophy, okay fine. He wants the crowd to give him respect when he comes out. The crowd doesn't. He says 3CW was full of backyarders and he proved it, and he's the best wrestler all of you idiots have ever seen. Now that he's 3CW champ, if they want their belt back, they have to book him at $300 a show. And 3CW can't afford it. He's proved he's the best wrestler in a 300 mile radius. Ummm...there's a lot of people from Chicago that would take issue with that. Plus he HAS NOT beaten everyone in NMW when he was there, which include Mississippi Madman and Shane Matthews. More music hits and Dickie Williams, Billy Reno and Mickey McNelson respond. They say he's done, Mickey says Rip is really just the biggest big mouth 3CW has ever had. Rip says the Dime-Store Howard Stern is gonna find out he talks the talk and walks the walk, this interview is over.

Drake vs. Gavin Alexander - They argue, Gavin attacks, headbutt, LOW BLOW. Drake slaps him, Gavin gets an armbar, Drake with shoulderblocks in the corner, Gavin with a rake, legdrop, leg punch to the groin. Dang this is a dirty fight. Gavin slugs away, clothesline, elbow gets two. Drake sideslam gets two. Axe to the head and pushes him to the floor, Gavin kicks Drake and throws him into the post. Gavin puts him in, gunslinger gets two, but Drake with the GORE GORE GORE gets the pin!

WINNER: Drake pin -> 6:35 mins. **¼

And Black Angel comes out with a kendo stick and BLASTS Drake across the back! That kid has the biggest red welt I've ever seen...running across from his arm, along his back and to his other arm. Yowch. Black Angel gets in the ring, says he's now aligned with Gavin and pulls off his mask! Morton Von Prose, whom I've known has been wearing the Black Angel mask for a while, appears to be ditching the second identity for reasons unknown.

Hardcore Match
Max Power vs. Dickie Williams Orlandi - DWO is about to call it a career, as he's taken way too many blows to the head and Max says he's bringing out his weapon, and it's Sly. Max shoves the ref into Dickie, then jumps DWO, suplex, forearms get two. Clothesline DWO, elbow, choke, wedgie and Max runs away. DWO chases, uppercut, they brawl on the floor, shoulderblock Max, clothesline. DWO charges him, and gets tied up in the ropes via his neck! YIKES! The ref manages to free him, Max stomps him on the floor, apron ram, Sly rams him too, Max goes for a pedigree, but DWO backdrops him. Elbow off the apron DWO, Max tosses DWO into the wall, Sly stomps away. They put him in, DWO with turnbuckle rams, goes up, but gets slammed off the top for two. Piledriver attempt is blocked, Max rides on DWO, Dick rolls over the top and pins him.

WINNER: Dickie Williams Orlandi pin -> 9:10 mins. **½

DWO ends up going to the hospital after this match, and that may have been his final bout ever.

Setup for this match, they've been promoting heavily on their streaming radio show this match, then there was a run-in at a UVW show at the north end of town, where Rip Mystic interfered in Danger Doug Fraze's match against Howard Stern. Danger posts complaints about it on Myspace. Rip Mystic finds himself on opposite teams against Stern in GAW, Stern lands a superkick on Mystic and scores the first elimination in the match somehow. And we get to here, as Danger was offered a free ticket to 3CW, he originally posts that he wasn't gonna go, but I arrive and find him in the parking lot. So now we have our combatants in the ring.

3CW Heavyweight Championship
(c)Rip Mystic vs. "Dime Store" Howard Stern - Yes, the antics by the Dime Store ripoff of Howard Stern known as Bryan Ealey are exactly that, and he needs to be yanked off the air for everyone's greater good. Shoulderblock Stern, takedown, Rip with a turnbuckle ram, they trade chops, and Stern tries a superkick early but Rip bails. They lock it up, Stern with an atomic drop and Rip tries to leave. Stern chases him but gets slugged, and Rip goes to a headlock but gets side slammed for one. Stern with a suplex gets two. Slam gets two, splash in the corner misses, kick attempt is caught, Rip with a knee punch and goes to work on the leg. Rip puts on a side leglock, leg yank, choke in the corner, choke and enzuigiri gets two. Rip with a SUPERKICK gets two...hmmm...wow. Rip goes up, moonsault MISSED! Stern with a side elbow, pedigree legdrop Stern, goes up, flying elbow gets two. Misfire superkick Stern nails ref Shawn Gotti, Rip with ANOTHER superkick, DDT is blocked, Stern with a SUPERKICK and I feel a gush of wind as Danger Doug Fraze leaps up and rushes the ringside area, and POWERBOMBS Dime Store to HADES! He puts Gotti in, Mystic IMPALER DDT on Dime Store and that gets the pin. And lookie here, Danger pulls his jersey from under the ring and raises Rip Mystic's hand. Beautiful. I wished I was in on it so I could rub it into Dime Store's face. Rip Mystic says this is only the beginning, NMW is the cream of the crop and 3CW is just crap. I have to wonder why Mystic is promoting NMW so much on a 3CW show, I wonder if he's trying to plod 3CW fans to go watch an NMW show? If Rip Mystic can carry Phil Roberts to a decent match, he can pretty much carry anybody and that's what this was.

WINNER and STILL CHAMP: Rip Mystic pin -> 15 mins. ***¼

The Verdict: Well, nothing but average matches from everyone, and with the bloody heat I wouldn't had blamed anyone from missing the show. It's unknown when they're gonna have another one, but we're waiting on this big 8-man NMW vs. 3CW survivor series match and it doesn't look to be anywhere in sight. And them guys will tear apart this rap sheet on their radio show, as they have pretty much have nothing better to do for the next several weeks as they're skipping August.

Thumbs leaning up.